Luke 10:38-42
Years ago, I was invited to hear an American woman, Florence Littauer, who was speaking at a function in Auckland. She is a Christian woman who has done a lot of study on understanding different personalities. Not only was she very funny but I found her to also be very informative. According to her, broadly speaking, there are four different personality types.
First there is the choleric personality. This is the action –oriented doer, who likes to take charge. They are happiest when they are in control.
Secondly there is the melancholy personality. This is the detailed planner. They have the ability to organize and are happiest when everything is done correctly.
Thirdly there is the sanguine personality. This is enthusiastic optimist with the bubbly personality. They are happiest when they are having fun.
And finally there is the phlegmatic personality. This is the thinker. They are happiest when everything is peaceful.
I have to confess, just in case you hadn’t already worked it out, I am a mixture of choleric and sanguine, which basically means I love to be in charge as long as I am having fun!!
The point of Littauer’s personality profile is fairly obvious. We are all different and when we recognize, understand, respect and celebrate our differences we get along better. It might surprise you that this idea is rooted deeply in the Bible, so it’s actually nothing new! It is also one of the key themes of Paul’s letter to the church in Corinth. Some are prophets and some are teachers. Some are action-orientated, while others are pensive and thoughtful. Some are enthusiastic motivators while others are controlled organizers. Some are loud and some are quiet. We are different people with different personalities, different styles, different temperaments and that’s OK! Indeed it is actually necessary as long as we are loving and tolerant about it.
You are probably wondering where I am going with this, and perhaps why I have chosen this particular reading for this morning. Not only is it a perfect backdrop that shows up different personality styles, but it also speaks to me of an attitude that I have had to repent of recently.
All morning long there has been a bustle of excitement in the home in Bethany. Jesus is coming for dinner. Martha is so excited and, being the perfect organizer, since day break, she has been frantically sweeping, scrubbing, dusting and darting in and out of the kitchen preparing the food and checking that everything is in order. Probably, if truth be known she’s been bossy and giving orders right left and centre! I get the feeling that she’s probably the choleric personality type! Needs to take charge!
Then Jesus arrives and what does Mary do? She whisks in to take over as hostess, as if she’s been doing all the work! She welcomes Jesus and the disciples warmly and ushers them into the living room. It sure looks like it’s going to be a great evening. Jesus is there with all his closest friends and he has so much to share. Mary, sensing a certain urgency in his voice, positions herself at his feet, peacefully drinking in his every word, totally oblivious to the fact that Martha isn’t there with her. Certainly the phlegmatic personality, wouldn’t you say?
Meanwhile, Martha is out in the kitchen, slaving away preparing the meal, checking the last minute details, and doing the one hundred and one things which, in her super-efficient mind, needed to be done. However, there is a problem. All the while Martha is working, she is seething inside. Her frustration mounts. “Where is Mary? Why isn’t she here helping me? Who does she think she is?” Ever felt that sort of resentment? Ever been faced with a situation where you feel you have been left to do the donkey work? We all experience this from time to time don’t we?
Finally, unable to contain herself any longer, her resentment erupts and she bursts into the living room and creates a scene. “Look here Jesus. Don’t you care that my sister Mary has left me to do all the work on my own? Tell her to get out and help me!” But Jesus says to her, “Martha, Martha, get off your high horse! Relax. Lighten up. There is only one thing worth being concerned over. Mary has discovered it and it will not be taken away from her.” End of story!
You see Jesus was not concerned about what Martha was doing outwardly, but rather about what she was feeling inwardly! His concern was for Martha herself. Here’s the thing! We might appear, on all intents and purposes, to have it all together on the outside but Jesus looks at our heart! He sees what we are really thinking and where our heart really is!
That day Jesus was concerned about Martha’s attitudes, for when Jesus looked at Martha he saw some red flags, some warning signals, some destructive attitudes within her which were more harmful to Martha herself than to anyone else. This really worried Jesus because he loved Martha. They were good friends but that day he saw in her some hurtful attitudes that were working in her like spiritual poisons, petty attitudes that, if left, can devastate and destroy the soul.
Firstly, he saw the attitude of resentment. Notice the three words used to describe Martha: distracted, anxious and troubled. That’s what resentment does to you! But even more, her resentment cut her off not only from her sister, Mary, but also from her Lord. The same thing happened to the elder brother in the Prodigal Son parable. He resented his brother and it cut him off from the Father. That’s how resentment affects us and why it is so dangerous. It separates us from people and it separates us from God.
I have to confess that recently, to my shame, God has had to deal to me because I allowed resentment to rear its ugly head in my life. And you know what, it robbed me of the blessings God had for me. I was reminded these past few weeks that Satan knows all our weak points and whenever we let our guard down, he’s in boots and all. I’m certainly not making excuses but I realised that I was still holding onto negative attitudes, formed way back in my up bringing. I have had to confess it to my elders and to repent of it before my Lord. Why? Not because it is a major sin but because simply this: That holding onto negative attitudes is extremely dangerous because it not only separates us from God, it robs us of the spirit of joy and any blessings God wants to give us and God needs me, as your vicar, to be accountable to Him.
Secondly, in this story, there is the attitude of narrowness. Martha’s view has become so narrow that she can’t see any other way to receive Jesus but her way and she wants to force her way on Mary. And people with the choleric personality type do need to be careful of this tendency! She is blind to the miracle of uniqueness. She forgets that we are all different; that we are individuals and that each of us has a unique relationship with our Lord.
Thirdly there is the attitude of unkindness. Martha tried to make herself look good by making Mary look bad. Unfortunately, it boomeranged back on her and she came out the unattractive one. Ultimately, it happens every time. Our harsh condemning judgements come back to haunt us when we are unkind to others.
In the Mary and Martha story, Jesus is teaching us a great lesson about our inner attitudes and I believe He is saying beware of resentment. Beware of narrowness and beware of unkindness. Choose instead the way of grace and love and compassion and be prepared to look at and work on the weaknesses in our own personalities in order that we can be the best we can be for Him.
